Monday, December 1, 2008

guess what i did!!

i hyper-extended the ligaments in my spine!!

this is fantastic!

so, the awful twisting injury of doom occured on wednesday
and tonight i finally made it into the emergency room
because no one should cry
on account of sitting
(which i did. sitting shouldn't HURT)

(right?)

yeh
so i went and they took like 5 xrays
which will cost me a small fortune
and they all looked fine
so
i waited in my room for an hour for the doctor to come in
and ask me to walk around on my toes
then my heels
then i had to bark like a dog
and catch a Frisbee with my teeth
and jump thru a flaming hula-hoop
and renounce satan
THEN he says

"it appears you have yah yah yah yah yah yah yah"

and he gives me some muscle relaxers and steroids and painkillers
and we hugged and kissed each other

then i waited for another 45 minutes for nurse to give me my discharge papers---

i won't lie
i thought they forgot me so
i counted the blood stains on the floor
(14 total)
((yeh, there was this weird little trail of blood around my room and into the hallway which no one had bothered to clean up))

then some other stuff happened
now i am blogging about it and
i feel very talkative
because i am also drinking a mix of baileys and egg nog
which is great, a little, right now
but i probably won't mix the two ever again

write it down, ladies...

2 comments:

.. said...

ouch. you know what will make you feel better? picking me up from the airport again on say the 14th and getting schwasted together. I promise I will sleep the night before this time so that I don't pass out at 8pm.

mandy jeanne said...

how do you always know?