have i told you about three cats joe?
we worked together at an upscale tavern about 3ree years ago. he liked to tell everyone he was a retired pilot, but really he wore a little skirt and pushed a cart around-- i'm sure if he ever got into the cockpit it wasn't on upright circumstances...
he was the strangest bird...
he would spend hours with me reviewing the dressings at the salad station- pointing to one pan, asking me to establish the condiment (
RANCH, jackass
), and then carefully catalouging the results in his handy dressing-identifier notebook he kept close in his dressing-identifier holster that hung fashionably on his hip--
i tired of this after a few weeks, and remarked "I thought you were manager of the dressing station when you were at delta, joe"
his nickname, three-cats, came from a conversation he started with me about pets one afternoon, and i told him i had three cats and he replies "THREE CATS??!!!??!" as if three cats was some sort of outrageous number, that one cat- even two cats would have been acceptable, but THREE cats?? that was just one cat too many!
he was eventually fired due to a set of fresh hands and an underage hostess named Beth.
anyway-
this comes up because before he got the can job, he talked endlessly about an english pub he wanted to open in mariemont. and i assume that by english pub he really meant coffe kiosk. i sometimes frequent this spot of the way to class- the coffee isn't bad, and it's inexpensive.
i went thru it the first time about a year and a half ago- and when his head popped out of the drive thru window, i nearly gagged on my tongue, and his face lights up and i'm getting ready to dissolve because i know he recognizes me and i don't want to do this, but then he exclaims, "Stephanie!!"
?? wha..
and so i'm like, "Hey, Joe!!" (Holding the three-cats like a jagger-shot revival in the back of my mouth)
and he can't think of anything eles to say, so he says "Nice seeing ya!" and disappears inside.
he has no idea who i am. and he only half-believes i'm this "stephanie".
This manifested again today, when he tried asking me how my job was going, he says "Are you at home depot or Lowes?"
and i said, "Lowes"
he made a face like he didn't feel right about this information, so he asks "Hows that going?"
WITHOUT skipping a beat i say "Real well"
he nods uncomfortably and departs
and here i am writing to you about this looney old man, who has the distinction of being known to me and everyone i know as
three.
cats.
joe.
(heh)
